Tuesday, May 31, 2011

May 31, 2011


Originally, I was going to have the title say, "Keep on trying," but then I remembered Master Yoda saying, "Do or do not; there is no try." When I worked at the detention center, we had a poster with Yoda and this saying hanging on the wall of our detention unit. Isn't this the truth! You either do or you do not, so I ask you to keep on doing!

With my niece being missing for 10 days now, I am sure that some of my facebook friends are probably tired of me posting her picture all over my facebook wall. However, I do not care what they think. I will keep posting her picture until she returns home safely. I will keep doing! I will not give up! I will keep praying, and I will keep asking my friends to do the same!

In order to accomplish anything in life, one must keep on doing no matter what it may be!!! Don't stop! Keep on doing!

May 30, 2011


Today is Memorial Day; the day we honor those who fight or who have paid the ultimate price for our freedom. So many people take for granted the freedom we possess here in this great nation of the United States. Our ancestors fought for freedoms that were being taken away from us. Our loved ones today fight for others to share the freedoms that we already have, and they fight for our country to keep the freedom that our ancestors fought for us to gain. Honor those who fight today, and honor those who have given their lives in order to secure our freedoms that we possess today.

Many people will celebrate the day by spending time with family and friends and by having barbecues. Many others will spend the day at Arlington National Cemetery mourning the loss of a son, daughter, mother, father, sister, or brother. While it is a wonderful occasion to spend time with our family members and our friends, we might want to say a prayer for those who no longer have certain family members or friends because they decided to sacrifice themselves in order to ensure our freedom that we all share today.

Remember the true meaning of Memorial Day and take time to remember those who have paid the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom!

May 29, 2011


A little over a month ago, I made a promise to God that I would no longer attempt to contact or communicate with certain members of my family. After 21 years of trying to get these people to like me, I finally made up my mind that I was done, and that I was walking out of their lives. In doing so, I made a promise to God that I would no longer try to talk these people into being my friend, that I would no longer communicate with these people via electronic communications for any reason; however, tonight I broke that promise to God. I contacted or tried to contact some of my family members asking them to post a picture of my niece on their facebook profiles, so that we can try to get her picture out to as many people as possible, so we can find her and bring her back home.

After contacting these people, I suddenly realized that I made a huge mistake. I broke my promise to God. I started to beat up on myself about the situation until my husband stopped me. He told me that this is a different situation. I was not contacting these people to try to win them over. I was trying to contact them because of a missing child. This was a life or death situation, and my husband reassured me that God would not be angry with me for breaking my promise in order to help a child. Do not be hard on yourself if you have to break a promise in order to help someone!

God knows that my intentions were only to help my missing niece, and He knows that I was not trying to harass any family members even if those family members chose to ignore my messages. I tried to help my niece and that is all that matters. God will forgive me for breaking my promise, but I have to be willing to forgive myself as well. I am getting better every day!

May 28, 2011


When others may be facing a very difficult period in their lives, do not be afraid to show them compassion. Don't be so blinded by your own life that you fail to see those around you who may be hurting. There is an old saying that says, "Don't criticize, condemn, or accuse until you have walked a mile in my shoes." It seems like no matter how hard of times some people may be facing, others will find fault with them no matter what. Don't be afraid to have compassion for others especially if you want others to show you compassion when you need it.

My mother is this type of person, and she hasn't changed even with the disappearance of her great-grand-daughter. I thought she would have compassion for what her grandson (the father) would be going through, but instead she has decided to find fault with how this family has lived throughout the years. Instead of saying that she hopes the great-grand-daughter gets home soon and safely, she makes rude remarks like this, "Well, someone should know where she is." Why is it so hard for this woman to show others compassion?

I cannot and will not answer on my mother's account. She is a grown woman who makes her own choices and having compassion is one she chooses not to participate in. However, I am taking this life experience with my mother as a learning experience, and I am choosing to take another route. I am choosing to have compassion. I remember how I felt when not too many people gave my family compassion when my husband was sick, and I have to admit that it sucked! Just because others were not compassionate to my family in our time of need does not mean I have to act the same way. Have compassion for others if you want them to show you compassion in your times of need!

May 27, 2011


When you know someone is doing something that is very wrong that could possibly hurt someone else or themselves, do NOT remain quiet! When we witness an act take place that we know is wrong, we need to speak up and tell someone who is in an authoritative position. By sitting back and doing or saying nothing, we are just as guilty as the person committing the wrong act. Do not be afraid of the consequences that may occur by speaking up. What may happen if we remain quiet may be worse than if we speak the truth. Do not remain quiet!

Today I was substituting at the local middle school, and a fight broke out near the end of day. I witnessed an aide and a teacher trying to physically restrain a child by using every wrong technique possible. As I watched the situation unfold, it became very aware to me that if this type of thing were to happen everyday that someone either the child or the teacher was going to get severely hurt or possibly killed. This entire situation unnerved me very badly, and it left me not knowing what to do. Should I get upper administration involved and tell them that the restraint positions they were using were illegal, or do I just keep my mouth shut. I knew in my heart that the type of hold the teachers were using to restrain this child was illegal because I used to work at a juvenile detention center, and the staff members were NEVER permitted to use this type of hold because it has been known to kill students. The more I thought about it, the more I knew I could not remain silent. I went to the administration office after the school day to discuss the situation with my boss. She assured me I had done the right thing, and she commended me for doing so.

Sometimes, we have to speak up and let people know when wrong things are taking place. If we were to remain silent, even worse things may occur in the future. If you know that someone has committed a wrong even if it was done out of ignorance of knowledge, please speak up and tell someone! Never remain silent! You could save a life!

May 26, 2011


With my niece (actually great-niece) missing, I have wondered if I should get involved with trying to help locate her. I have not spoken to any my family members in the past two years. My help may be unwanted; however, this situation is not about me, it is about finding a young girl and returning her with her family as quickly as possible. So, I put my "feelings" behind me, and I contacted my great-niece's dad who is my nephew and also contacted his sister to let them know that I am going to try to help find her. They both accepted the help and actually welcomed it. My nephew simply said, "Please help me find my daughter."

When we are faced with difficult decisions it is always best to remember to do the right thing. Sometimes, we need to let go of the fact that maybe these same people were not there for us in our times of need. We need to learn to let go of how these same people may have caused us hurt in the past for the sake of another person's needs. This time it is the need of a young girl getting back with her family where she belongs.

Do the right thing! Always! Even if it means swallowing your pride and giving an apology that you may feel you do not need to give. Follow your heart and do the right thing! Especially if it involves the welfare of a child.

May 25, 2011


Most parents already love their children unconditionally, but sometimes we need to be reminded just how special our children are in our lives. Children are a blessing from God! We as adults should tell our children every day how much we love them and remind them what they mean to us. Never take your child/children for granted! Love your children unconditionally as God loves us!!!

Today, I found out that my 14 year old niece ran away from home on Sunday evening. The news came as a complete shock as her picture began rapidly spreading over facebook. When my family received the news, we spent a few hours scouring the streets of our local town looking for her. Then it dawned on me that I probably would not even recognize her if I saw her, because it has been several years since I have seen her. Regardless, my family drove around town looking for the girl whose picture was plastered all over facebook.

How many times do we get angry with our children over petty little issues? How many times do we create standards for our children which are so high that we could never meet these standards as adults? How many times do we push our children to be involved in way too many activities when all they want to do is play and be a kid? The one thing a child wants the most is to be loved by his or her parents. They want the same unconditional love in which God gives us! Take the time to let your kid be a kid, and why not be a kid right along with your children. Love, love, love your children everyday, and tell them that everyday! NEVER take your children for granted!

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

May 24, 2011


How often do you take a day just to be alone with yourself? If you do take time out of your busy schedule, how do you celebrate you? Do you go to your favorite restaurant by yourself for breakfast, lunch, or dinner? Do you curl up in your favorite spot whether in your backyard, in your sitting room, or on your bed with your favorite book? Do you take yourself on a much deserved shopping spree? Today, I kind of took a "me" day, and I spent it by relaxing on my lounge chair on my deck outside with a new inspirational book by Beth Moore called "Get Out of That Pit." Everyone once in a while get into the habit of treating yourself to a "me" day!

I read my book in the morning and part of the afternoon in between a few loads of laundry (so, technically today wasn't a total "me" day which I might add I never do). After I picked up my son from school, we stopped at one of the local department stores, so I could treat myself to a new pair of sandals (which I am not sure if I quite like...they might make a reappearance at the store, so I can get my money back). But nevertheless, I spent the day doing something I enjoy which is reading an inspirational book and by convincing myself not to be guilty for spending some money on a new pair of sandals.

Sometimes, we get so involved with our daily routines that we never take time for ourselves. We never pamper ourselves. Once in a while we need to go out and buy ourselves something that we have been looking at for months or even years that has been sitting on that store shelf. Joyce Meyer has a book called "Eat the Cookie and Buy the Shoes." I haven't read it yet, but I bet that it has something to do with treating yourself to something nice once in a while. Take the time to celebrate yourself, and treat yourself to a well-deserved "me" day!

May 23, 2011


How many times do we hold onto friendships that just are not working any longer? How many times do you keep investing precious time and energy into someone who is not investing the same into you? Sometimes, we grow out of our relationships. As we mature and grow-up, we suddenly realize that the elementary school friend that we have had for the past 25 years no longer shares the same values in which you have grown into. Once you  become aware that you and your friend do not edify each other any more, then you may want to go your own separate ways. Say good bye to those who may be bringing you down to a level in which you do not want to be on.

A little over a year ago, I lost my best friend of 27 years. It was a heartbreak that shattered me, and it took me several months to get over the hurt that I felt. I was devastated that this woman/girl who I had grown up with could be so vicious and mean spirited. However, she moved to a state 900 miles away from where I lived, and we were trying to hold on to a long-distance friendship. However, both of us were changing, growing, and evolving into different people, and when faced with a stressful situation, we both took opposites sides. Needless to say, this ended a life-long friendship.

After a year of learning and studying, I am no longer bitter toward my friend. I have learned how to implement the words "good bye" into my life and vocabulary. Sometimes, our friendships are only meant to last a certain period of time. I read a poem that said friendships either last for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. I look at this particular friendship as a seasonal friendship. All of our friendships are created to teach us valuable lessons, and when they end (or if they end), it is our responsibility to learn what lesson the Big Man Upstairs is trying to teach us. I believe that the lesson God wanted me to learn is to turn to Him and not other people in my times of need. People will let us down, but God will NEVER let us down. He will always be there for us! The sooner you stop holding onto a broken friendship, and the sooner you say "good bye," you will be able to find peace and move on with your life! Please do not hold on for five months like I did. As T.D. Jakes has said find the gift of good bye!

Monday, May 23, 2011

May 22, 2011


Sometimes, people become discontent with life, because they have nothing to occupy their time other than work or tv. I know in my own personal experience, I struggle with depression, because I lack friends. Maybe, I should rephrase that a little bit. I have some very close friends; we just never do anything together unless I do the inviting. My family doesn't have many family members who visit or we visit in return, so we need to find something to occupy our time when we are not working or going to school, so we do not become bored with life. Find a hobby!

Since my husband's recovery, he has taken up oil painting. So far, he has created seven beautiful paintings from mountain scenes, ocean scenes, and country scenes to people and lions. He just did one this past Saturday for me which was the lion. I would post a picture of one of his masterpieces, but I am not sure how he would feel about me posting his artwork online.

My son has started to make mini stop-animation films. He is quite good at it, and his hobby even sparked an intense conversation with Patrick Kinkade about which film school my son should attend to pursue his love of film making.

As for me, I would have to say that reading is probably my hobby. I love to read all kinds of inspirational books to learn different methods of dealing with things that may stress me out, or how to deal with my depression or life in general. Recently, I have been learning how to react in more positive manners to negative situations, and I must say that I am winning this battle.

Don't get bored with your life. Find a hobby and watch your creativeness explode!

May 21, 2011


There is a rumor going around that the end of the world is going to take place today at 6 p.m. According to this rumor, this is when the rapture is suppose to take place, and life as we know it will cease to exist. Well, I would like to report that I am typing this past 6 p.m., and the world has not ended and the rapture has not commenced. People get so caught up in the "end of days" that they forget to live their lives now. They constantly worry that the world is ending just because of natural disasters or world wars. If these people were so worried, all they would have to do is pick up a Bible and read it. Then they would find out that no one is ever going to know the day or the time when the Lord is supposed to return. Don't waste your time by worrying about the end of the world!

The last thing I want to do is push my Spiritual views on anyone; however, I do know that the Earth is billions of years old, and I really do not think it is going anywhere anytime soon (and probably not in my lifetime or my child's lifetime). I do believe that their is a Creator, and I call this Creator, God. My belief is God wants us to live our lives to the fullest, and the last thing God wants us to do is worry about when the last days are going to be. Life is a beautiful thing, and it should be cherished every single day that we are graced to walk this beautiful, wonderful planet!

Instead of sitting around preaching gloom and doom, make the most of your days! Bless other people with your presence! Make someone's day a little more brighter! Live your life to the fullest! Don't worry about tomorrow, because it is never promised. Jesus said to let tomorrow take care of itself. The only thing you have to worry about is today, right here, and right now!

May 20, 2011


How many times in life do you need a friend to vent or confide in, but none are to be found, or they are too busy to be bothered with your so-called problems? However, when those same people need the same, you are the first person they turn to? Why do you think this happens? It could be, because  you are a very loyal and trustworthy friend, and your true friends trust you, and they cherish your advice. Just because our friends and family members may not be there for us when we need someone to hear us out, doesn't mean that we cannot be there for them when they need someone to hear their worries or concerns. Be there for your loved ones, and be the shoulder to cry on!

We all usually have at least one person in our lives who we trust with our top secrets. We know that no matter when we need this person even if it is in the middle of the night that they will always be there for us. We know that no matter what we tell them that our words will be safe with them, and we usually do the same for them in return. Let your friends and family members know that if they need you that you will always be there for them. Tell them that you will be their shoulder to cry on!

May 19, 2011


How many times do you find yourself becoming irritated and short with other people? Do you find that some people or many people rub you the wrong way? How do you react to these people? Do you snap, yell, or sigh loudly to those who might not be reacting to a situation the same way you might react? Learn to have patience with others!

You never know what other people may be facing in their daily lives. The checkout  operator at the convenience store you stop at in the morning on your way to work may be moving a little slower today, because yesterday she may have been diagnosed with a life-threatening illness. The man who may be walking up the hallway slower than you like may have hurt his leg yesterday, so it hurts for him to walk quickly. The co-worker who keeps walking out of the room may not be shirking his duties like you may think, but he may be going to the bathroom to hide his tears because his loved one is in the hospital, and the doctors are not sure she will make it. The little boy in your class who keeps staring out the window and who is having a hard time concentrating today, just found out that his dad might die from cancer. The family member who yells at you may have reached a level of frustration that she can no longer take due to dealing with stresses that you know nothing about.

We never know what another person may be dealing with in his or her own personal life, so we need to learn to be patient and kind to everyone we encounter. If someone seems to be having a bad day, maybe, you could be the person to kindly smile and to tell him or her to have a nice day. However, maybe you could take it one step further by telling them what a great job they are doing either at work or with life in general. You might brighten that person's day by allowing them to forget their worries even if for a brief period of time. Be patient with others you never know what kind of battle they may be facing!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

May 18, 2011


How many times have people said the words "I love you," but you walk away from them kind of shaking your head and wondering why they even bother to say the words? How many times have you faced a hard time in your life, but you had no one to turn to for help? Sure you had people who would say, "I am thinking about you or I love you." However, none of these people stepped up to the plate to throw in a helping hand. My friend, love is an action not just a word or emotion.

Many times when we are facing tough times, we want people to prove to us that we are special to them. Wouldn't it be nice to receive a card in the mail from one of your good friends just to tell you that you mean the world to them. Maybe, you should be the one to start showing your love and appreciation. Sometimes, it is up to us to be the change. Sometimes, it works and our effort catches on, and sometimes, people just don't get it and keep living their rapid, paced lives.

Here are some examples of how you might be able to show someone you truly care about that you do love them. In the morning, bring your loved one a cup of coffee without them asking. Send a friend or family member a card telling them how much you appreciate them. Give your loved one a big hug and kiss when they get home from school or work. If someone is facing something that might be very stressful, bring them a meal, so they do not have to worry about cooking for a night or two. If a neighbor is facing a struggle, mow their grass so that they have one less burden to worry about. Send someone an anonymous gift card to their favorite restaurant. There are so many things that you can do to show people that you truly care and to show them that you truly do love them.

Put an action behind your words. Of course our friends and family members want to hear the words, "I love you." However, those words are meaningless if there is no action put behind them. Show someone that you care today! Put action behind your words and emotions!

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

May 17, 2011


Have you ever heard the saying that life is what you make it? What are your initial thoughts on life? Do you think it is mundane? Do you think it is hell on earth, or do you think that life is Heaven on Earth? In a book called, Spiritual Liberation, by Michael Bernard Beckwith, he speaks about awakening from a slumber that so many people walk around in on a daily basis. We are truly not awake but merely existing transitioning from one state of apathy to the next. We are not present in many of our daily routines, but we take on the exterior of a robot doing the same tasks over and over without much thought or emotion. However, once we begin to awaken, we will soon realize how beautiful life truly is.

I have spoken in older posts how colors will become more vibrant, sounds will become more vivid, your feelings of love will multiply in leaps and bounds, but your feelings of dislike or even hate will disintegrate and cease to exist. When you start having such overwhelming feelings of love, people may start noticing a change in your attitude. You may be less critical of people who may have rubbed you the wrong way in the past. You may find yourself saying please and thank you more often. You might even feel that you need to express your love to others in ways such as vocalizing your message or sending it via electronic communications.

Life is truly what you make it. If you think life is crap, well it will definitely be crap. However, if you think life is beautiful and wonderful, and you keep telling yourself that message every day, then you will start believing yourself. You will believe what you tell yourself more than what other people will tell you. The next time you look at the grass, the trees, the flowers, truly look at them. Don't just glance at the nature surrounding you, but really look at it and appreciate it. You will soon be finding yourself purposefully looking for the beauty that life possesses!

Monday, May 16, 2011

May 16, 2011


In the past few years, it seems as if my life has become stagnated. It started when I closed the doors of my in-home daycare. My  very successful in-home daycare, I might add. Four months after I closed the doors, I started working at a juvenile detention center which is totally a whole other realm than watching little kids. However, I enjoyed my job working with juvenile delinquents, and my career was starting to take shape as I could see the direction I wanted to progress with this company.

After I finished my Associates Degree, my next step on the career ladder would have been Counselor. My plans were to return to school to the University of Colorado distance learning program since my company has a headquarters in Colorado, and they made a deal with the university to provide our employees with a degree program that was hard to beat. Then once I would have secured my Bachelor's Degree, I would have worked with my manager to get my teaching certificate. Then I would have become a teacher at the juvenile detention center. However, God must have other plans for me, because near my one year anniversary with my company, I sustained a herniated disc in my back which required me to submit my resignation to the company I loved so dearly. Needless to say, all my plans and dreams went up in smoke.

In the past two years, I have been looking for a full-time job while trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. It is truly sad that at 38 years of age, I have no clue what I want to do when I grow up. What I do know is that I want more from my life!

Now, I am not talking about materialistic objects. I do not need the big, fancy houses or cars, the expensive clothes and accessories, or anything like that. However, I must say that type of lifestyle would be nice. I would love to not owe another penny on medical bills, and I would love to be able to pay cash for my gasoline in my car instead of having to put it on my credit card, because I don't make enough money to pay for it with cash. Guess I should think twice about buying artwork...LOL! That was a treat for my family, because of the hell of year we have been through with my husband's cancer. After a while, you get tired of spending all your hard earned cash on bills, and you splurge and treat yourself to something nice. We have this one life, so we might as well live it!

Anyway, I will get off my soap box. After meeting Patrick Kinkade this weekend, it left me wanting more from my life. Sometimes, I feel like I am wasting so much precious time. I want to do things to help people. I have a book sitting on my computer about the struggles my family faced during my husband's battle with cancer, but I have no idea what to do with it. Should I try to publish it? How would I go about doing that? I have so many questions about my life, but I have no idea who to direct these questions to. I live in a small town where your family expects you to just get a job and work for the rest of your life once you graduate from high school if you choose to graduate from high school. That was never a requirement in my household growing up, but I have to say that I made it a requirement in my own life!

I am at a crossroads in my life, and I want a change! I want to live my life to the fullest, and I want to be able to help and bless people along the way! I want to be the person God wanted me to be when He sent me to this planet. I am tired of living a life of mediocrity, and I want more from my life!

Sunday, May 15, 2011

May 15, 2011


When was the last time you got really excited about something? When was the last time you truly looked forward to an upcoming event? In the past few years, I have become unable to become excited about hardly anything in life. I remember getting ready to leave for an event, and my husband would ask me if I was excited. My reply would be a simple "no." Once I was at the event, then I would become excited, but I could not get excited anytime before the event. Learn to become like a child and learn to get excited again!

My personal opinion on this matter as to why we cannot get excited any longer is because we start to take life too seriously. We start viewing our stresses too critically instead of appreciating our blessings in which we already have. In the last three years, I have gone from being a very successful business woman who owned and operated her own in-home daycare to a woman who is making pennies working as a substitute teacher's aide for the local school district. I look back at how my family was well off during the ten year period I had my own business, and now we are scraping to make our bills every month. I think it is because I lost my excitement for life and living. I need to learn how to make a living again by doing things in which I love. That may take some probing my mind and thoughts for a while, but I know I can come up with something.

Have you lost your passion for life? Have you forgotten what makes you happy? Well, I challenge you to go out and find that passion all over again. Get excited about you life and start living how you were meant to be living!

Saturday, May 14, 2011

May 14, 2011


For a very long time, I have been a huge fan of Thomas Kinkade, The Painter of Light. I have collected and read several of his books over the years, and nearly 12 years ago, I bought my first two Thomas Kinkade paintings. Those two painting have been a special part of our home all these years. Recently, my family obtained another Thomas Kinkade painting from a local art gallery which was going out of business. We got a tremendous deal that we could not pass up. We found another art gallery which framed the unframed piece of art we bought, and in the process, we found out that Thomas Kinkade's brother, Patrick Kinkade, was going to be part of an art festival that was taking place at this gallery this weekend. Dreams do come true, because I never in my wildest dreams ever would have thought that I would meet the brother of Thomas Kinkade!

At first when my husband asked me if I wanted to go to the event, I was not sure if this would be something that I would enjoy. I was not sure if my family would fit-in with a bunch of arties or people who buy a lot of expensive artwork. We are just an average, ordinary family scraping to get by. I thought for sure that we would be out of place at such an event; however, I told my husband if he made the arrangements that I would go with him. Thank God I said this, and thank God we went, because it was an amazing experience! My entire family including our 14 year old son had an amazing time! Patrick Kinkade is truly an amazingly humble, entertaining, funny character of a man! He and my son were joking back and forth with one another, and when my son told him that he was interested in stop-animation, Patrick stopped hand-highlighting our painting, and he turned around in his chair, focused directly on my son, and had a conversation with him about where he should go to film school.

Not only did we meet Patrick Kinkade, but we also met a Disney artist by the name of Mike Kupka. My son really enjoyed spending time with Mike and talking with him, because he has also done Star Wars artwork for George Lucas. My son is a huge Star Wars fan, so this was right up his alley. My son even asked Mike at the end of the evening if he could get his picture taken with him. I could tell that my entire family had an amazing time at this event.

Never give up on your dreams, because you have no idea what might be in store for you that is just around the next corner. Years ago when I bought my first Thomas Kinkade paintings, I never thought that I would be meeting Thomas Kinkade's brother. However, tonight was a night that I will never forget! Tonight has reminded me to reach for your dreams and to dream big! Dreams truly do come true!

May 13, 2011


How many tests do we face in a day's time? How many of these tests do we pass? Some days the tests start as soon as we get out of the bed in the mornings. You are walking to the bathroom when you stub your toe on the door. As you are trying to get ready for work, you drop everything from the bathroom counter onto the bathroom floor. As you are trying to make a pot of coffee, you spill the coffee grounds onto the floor. If this happened to most of us we would probably make the following comment: "It's going to be one of those days." However, if we look at these situations as tests, we might not allow such inconveniences to ruin our days. Maybe, God is trying to get us to be more patient, or maybe, He is trying to get us to not react in such negative ways when things do not go our way. If we can pass these tests, life becomes more enjoyable, and we will no longer allow petty, little inconveniences to ruin our precious time here on Earth.

Learn to look at nearly every situation you go through as a test. A few months ago, I horribly failed a test (several tests actually). I received a message from someone, and instead of simply deleting the message, I replied to it. I felt my reply was in taste and was very respectful; however, the person I was replying to had negative intentions behind the message and sent me many hurtful messages within the next several days. The last message made me extremely angry, and I replied with some not so nice words. I look back now, and I realize that I failed that test. However, I learned from my mistake, and when I received a letter in the mail from someone who was trying to test me again, I simply did not react at all. I did not call this person, I did not email this person, I simply went on with my life!

As we grow and as we become more mature, we will start passing more of the tests that we face on a daily basis. We will recognize very clearly when we fail, but we will know not to react as we have in the past. Look at each situation we face in our daily journeys as tests, and soon you will be passing every test that comes your way!

May 12, 2011


Who is in charge of your dreams? The question might be answered by asking yourself, "Who is in charge of your life?" You are! We create the life we want to live by the dreams we create for ourselves. The only way a dream can die is if you stop creating them within your own mind.

Your possibilities are limitless. No matter what you want to do, you can do it if you have the right mindset. If you want to go to college, you can do it regardless of how you were raised. Even if you are the poorest kid in your graduating class, you can go to college and earn a degree if you want it badly enough. Even if someone in your life has told you that you would never amount to anything, you can become the person of your dreams if you don't allow those dreams to die. When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a school teacher. I talked about it morning, noon, and night. Then one day, my mother sat me down at our kitchen table and told me to get these ridiculous thoughts out of my head, because I would get married and have babies like she and my sisters had done. So, I put college out of my  head, and I got married two years after graduating from high school and had my son three years later. However, after many years of marriage, I went back to school, and I earned an Associates Degree in Business Management. It's not the teaching degree I wanted as a child, but it is still a college degree, and I am proud to say I was the first of my immediate family to graduate from high school and the first to earn a college degree.

Your life is what you make it! It is up to you to determine what kind of life you want to live. Do you want to sit back and listen to all the naysayers all your life, or do you want to be a trend setter and start making positive changes in your own life. Follow your dreams, because you never know where they might lead you! Never allow your dreams to die!

May 11, 2011


When we become at peace with God, we will feel overwhelmed with a love that just does not stop. This happens when we get comfortable in our own skin, and we start to accept ourselves for who we are instead of comparing ourselves to other people. When we allow love into our hearts, we will be able to give that love to other deserving people. Let love fill your heart and give it to someone today!

As I was driving home from picking up my son from school today, my heart became filled with the feeling of love. I found myself smiling at everyone as we drove by them on the street. Even if I purposely thought of someone who had caused me pain in the past, that hurt and pain no longer mattered. The only thing that mattered was the love that I was feeling at that point in time. Those negative things that may have happened last week, last month, or last year no longer had any more control over me. The only thing that kept going through my mind was the love that I felt for my family and for those who have been there for me.

When we experience this kind of love, we are living in the present moment or the Now! We are starting to understand that what happened yesterday does not matter any longer. When we embrace this kind of love, we show others how much they mean to us. So many times, we take our loved ones for granted; however, when love flows through our veins on a daily basis, we have no choice but to get our priorities in life straightened out. Let love fill your heart and share it with the world.

Friday, May 13, 2011

May 10, 2011


Anger is a very strange thing that if not handled properly can consume you into a deep negative pit. Usually, anger stems from another person hurting you, or it may stem from something not going your way. You can allow this anger to take over your life, or you can let it go and not be controlled by such negative emotions. Let go of anger and learn to enjoy each day, because we never get to repeat any of our days. We are given one shot at each of our minutes of each of our days, so you them wisely!

This post is not going to be lengthy, because I believe it is self-explanatory. While my husband, son, and I were waiting to check-in for my husband's surgery a year ago, the receptionist had a piece of paper taped to the side of her cubicle with the following message: Each minute we stay angry is a minute of our lives we will never get back. I do not know who the author is, but this saying has stuck with me since that day. How many minutes of our days do we waste by being angry over petty little issues that don't even matter. Learn to let go of anger, so you do not waste any more of your precious time.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

May 9, 2011


This sounds so easy to do, but how many of us truly accept God's love as He willingly gives it to us. Accepting God's love is a more difficult task than some might want to admit. We get so hung up on our mistakes that sometimes we can't see past them. We need to admit when we are wrong and when we have made a mistake, but then we must move forward. We need to know that God loves us regardless of the mistakes we have made. His love in unconditional, and He will never let us down. Accept God's love, because He wants us to be happy in our lives.

When we accept God's love, we are able to give others love. Some of us might have difficulty showing others love especially if we have been hurt many times in our lives. In my personal life, there have been many times when I put up barriers, because of how others mistreated me. Many times, I would find myself lashing out at others, because of the way I had been negatively treated. However, when we fully accept God's love how people hurt us in the past may no longer hold a weight over our shoulders. We many find that we no longer even think about past hurts or the people who hurt us.

Accepting God's love releases us from bondages. It releases us from obsessing about what other people think about us. As Joyce Meyer once said, "We need to be completely delivered from caring what other people think." God knows the mistakes we are going to make long before we ever make them, so try not to get so side-tracked that you fall into that pit of despair, because you got off course for a little while. Get back on course, accept God's love, so that you can be an asset in God's Kingdom and share and spread His love!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

May 8, 2011


Today is Mother's Day, and today started out wonderful with my husband and son giving me humorous cards first thing this morning in honor of my special day. As the morning wore on, I knew that I was going to have to do something special for my mother on this day. My mom and I have a very strained relationship. I wouldn't call it a love/hate relationship (I probably would have in the past with the emphasis being placed on the hate), but I would call it a stressful relationship. I don't know what it is, but when I get around my mother, I find myself snapping out at her. I blame it on her negativity. However, I made up my mind that I would approach today in a different manner. I read something recently (I don't remember where I read it) that if you pray for extra patience and guidance when  you know you are going to be in a negative person's presence that it will help you get through the situation much easier. So, today while I was picking up my mother's items that she needed at the grocery store, I said small little prayer that went something like this: "Dear Lord, Please help me keep my cool when being around my mother today. I know today is mother's day, so please help me to not snap out at her today."

Guess what??? Today went great! My mother came to my house and hung out with my husband, son and I while we had a barbecue on my back deck. It was nice for a change, and we were actually able to have adult conversations without me snapping out at her. She seemed to be not so critical today and in a much better mood than what she had been two weeks earlier at Easter time. Maybe, she was taking her medication more regularly lately, or maybe, my prayer helped me to be more patient with her and helped me to not take everything she says so personally.

I know how our relationships can be strained with our mothers. I know how difficult it can be to be in the presence of a critical mother. However, these are the women who brought us into this world and who gave us life, so we should be able to at least show a little appreciation one day a year even if we only send a card through mail. I believe today might be a turning point for my mother and me. Maybe we will finally be able to get along without biting each other's heads off when we try to talk to one another. Show your mom some love on Mother's Day!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

May 7, 2011


Joyce Meyer writes in her books about going around the same mountain over and over again. What that means is we keep making the same mistakes over and over again. We think we are going to get different results by doing the same things again and again. If you are tired of going around that same mountain, then make a promise to God that you are going to change your ways. I have found in my own life that this is the only way I can make a positive change in my life, and that is by promising God that I will change.

I have never been a person to make promises. I feel terrible if for some reason I cannot keep them, so I refuse to make them. However, in the past few months I have had some personal attacks brought against me by some family members, and I found myself reacting to each event the same way. I kept sending these people messages either via email or facebook trying to explain to them that their perception of me was all wrong, and I kept trying to defend myself. What I wasn't understanding was those same people were only standing back reading my messages and making fun of me behind my back and calling me crazy.

All my life, I have felt that I need to defend myself. Over the years, I have been blamed for so many things that were out of my control including my own conception. Apparently, according to my half-sister, that was my fault too, and I should have never been born. However, during the need to defend myself, I wasn't aware that I was making myself look like a fool. So, I decided a few weeks ago that I need to change. There is nothing I can ever do or say to get people to change their preconceived ideas of me. I made a drastic decision, and I promised God that I would never email or send any letters to anyone in my husband's family. I had to make a promise to God; otherwise, I would still be going around that same mountain and bothering people who clearly do not want to bothered by me.

Making a promise to God probably sounds silly to some, but it was the only thing that I could think to do that would force me to change my ways. I will never break a promise, so now if I receive any messages from anyone on my husband's side of the family, I will either hit the delete button and not reply, or I will throw the letter I receive through the mail in the trash. If you are struggling to change in a certain area of your life, but you take your promises seriously, then maybe, you want to consider making a promise to God in order to change your negative behavior. It is working for me!

May 6, 2011


There are times in our lives when we have to accept things that are hard, and we might balk at accepting these things; however if we want to heal in certain areas, we have no choice but to accept the difficulties in life. So many of my family's friends and other family members turned their backs on us this past year which was the most difficult year of my family's life. My expectations of how I thought things should be with our family members and friends were different than how things turned out. I walked away from this past year and a half extremely disappointed. However, in order to heal, I must accept the fact that not everyone on the planet including friends and family members are going to care what my family goes through. Acceptance will lead to healing.

In the past year and a half, only three of my family members have visited my family. Only these three family members know what my husband now looks like since he has lost so much weight. I was even told by one of my niece's that everyone has their own lives to live, and they do not have time to be concerned with what my family goes through on a daily basis. These words were like a slap across my face, because my family has been there for her family in the past. Never once did I ever forget her children at Christmas or their birthdays. That goes for my entire family and my husband's family. We were ALWAYS there for them when they all needed help. However, this past year turned out differently for us. Everyone turned their backs and walked out of our lives.

Acceptance will lead to much needed healing. Today, I have accepted that there are people in our lives who truly do not want to have anything to do with me or my family. If they did, they would have been there for us in the past year and a half. However, they were not. I do not feel that in such a dire time that people need to specifically ask others for help. Shouldn't people be willing to step up to the plate and lend a helping hand? Maybe, I am so old fashioned in my thinking that I fail to live properly in the 21st century. By my accepting that there are people who truly do not care, my wounds can start to heal, and I can go on and live my life for my husband, my son, and myself. Acceptance will heal all wounds!

May 5, 2011


Sometimes, our emotions get the better of us, and we start feeling down for no reason at all. Sometimes, we just have down days. The last couple of days have been that way for me, but I am convinced that it is due to another medical test that my husband had to have done today. The last time he had this same test done, the results were not as we had anticipated, and that was the day we learned of the tumor in my husband's stomach and esophagus. Today he will be having the same procedure, because he has been having some difficulty swallowing in the last few months. We did learn from one of my husband's doctors that regardless of the outcome of today's procedure, he will still have to have another surgery to correct a problem that resulted from his major surgery a year ago. All these worries have been weighing on my mind, plus the fact that everyone who we thought cared about us walked out of our lives in the last year and a half. I suppose I blame myself for this, because I was severely honest with people about my husband's condition thinking that brutal honesty would get them to start caring and wanting to visit my husband; however, I was extremely wrong. So in the midst of me feeling down, I have to do all I can to pick myself back up.

In order to pick myself back up and to start feeling happy again, I usually read inspirational books. Today during my husband's procedure, I read Joel Osteen's, It's Your Time. My husband and son gave me this book for Christmas, and I have been reading it for the last several months. I have been rereading some Joyce Meyer books in the past few months as well. Some of these books have been Approval Addiction and Battlefield of the Mind. I feel that I need to keep reading inspirational books on a daily basis or my mood starts to slip, and I find myself in a pit of despair. However, God does not want us to feel down. He wants us to be happy every day of our lives, because each day is a gift from God.

When you start feeling down, do what works for you to lift your spirits. Maybe taking a walk will make you feel better. Possibly taking a drive in the country will make you feel better. Watching a funny movie might be what makes your mood more cheerful. Maybe talking to a friend on the phone will help lift your spirits. If you feel yourself becoming down, don't stay that way for a very long time. Lift your spirits and get happy again.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

May 4, 2011


Today I was watching Joyce Meyer's television program, "Enjoying Everyday Life," and she was talking about how people do not like themselves. She was making jokes that no matter where you go, there you are. She was saying that you are with yourself more than anyone else is ever going to be with you, so you better like yourself. This made me think back to my past, and it made me realize that for many years, I did not like myself. I was a miserable person to be around, and after all those years, I am finally starting to learn how to enjoy being with myself.

It probably sounds absurd that people may despise themselves, but I think it may be more popular of an act than what we might want to accept. We are harder on ourselves than what others probably will ever be with us. I know whenever someone would criticize me or condemn me, I would be 100 times harder on myself than the person condemning me. I would magnify the situation and make it much worse. However, God does not want us doing this! God wants us to love ourselves as He loves us. We need to become our own best friend, because one day that "so-called" best friend of yours might walk out of your life. I know, because I lived it a year ago.

Start enjoying your life by enjoying being in your own skin. Enjoy being with yourself. Learn to speak confidently to yourself. Like Joyce Meyer says you have to be with yourself the most throughout the day, so you might as well learn how to get along with yourself.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

May 3, 2011


In the past, I have stated that each day is a blessing. However, each day is also a new beginning. Each new day is an opportunity sent to us from God to fix what we may have broken yesterday. Maybe, we got off track yesterday, and we were not in the best of moods. Maybe, in the process of the day, we snapped at our loved ones, or maybe, we took our sadness or aggressions out on them. Well, today is a new beginning. Today we can make our past wrongs right.

Yesterday I was in a blah mood. I was sad and melancholy, and my mind kept wondering back to past words that many people have said to me over the years. Yesterday was not one of my more joyful days. I allowed negative thoughts to rob me of happiness. However, when I woke this morning, and I saw the sun shining brightly through my bedroom windows, I told myself that today is a new day. Yesterday may have been gloomy, but today will be shiny bright!

If you did something yesterday that you are not proud of, then do something to turn that wrong into a right. If you snapped out at someone who did not deserve it, apologize to him or her. Maybe someone called you, but you did not feel like talking at the time, so you cut the conversation short. Call them today and have an extra long conversation.

Make today a good day! Today is a blessing from God! Each day we can learn and grow! Today is a new beginning! Use your time wisely!

May 2, 2011


"For as he thinks in his heart, so is he" Proverbs 23:7. This phrase is so true, because we believe the thoughts we tell ourselves more than we believe what other people tell us about ourselves. When I was a child, I had a pretty good self-esteem. I was a very shy child, but around the fifth grade, I started to emerge a little bit from my shell. Then probably when I was around 10 years old and in the sixth grade, something happened that made me question my worth in this world. My one half-sister (we had the same father but different mothers) screamed at my parents that I was nothing but an illegitimate bastard and that my mother should have had an abortion because I was a disgrace to the family because I was born out of wedlock. These words played a part in my life for the next 28 years. If there is one valuable lesson that I can offer people is instead of listening to negative forces in this world, listen to what God has to say about you! You will become the person who you think you are, so please think positive, loving thoughts about yourself.

We are not a mistake here on this planet! Let me repeat, because I need to hear this myself again and again, we are not a mistake here on this planet! God formed us in His image! He knew us before we were born! He sent us here with a purpose! You might be saying, "Oh yeah, well what is my purpose?" Your purpose is to be yourself and to love!

When I was a little girl, I remember watching the news, and I remember getting upset when I would see images of homeless people. I remember saying to my father, "Why doesn't anyone help those poor people?" One image that has stuck in my head is a man standing next to a fire that he had built in a barrel to warm his hands. He had no coat, no gloves, no hat. I remember looking at my Dad and saying, "When I grow up, I am going to give hats, gloves, and scarves to the homeless."

That memory faded until about five years ago. A lady who was a member of the church I was attending at the time was starting a "hats" ministry in our local community. She would buy winter hats and place them in a ziploc baggy with a Bible scripture. Then she would take these hats out to the streets, and she would donate them to the homeless or needy people in our area. One day during Sunday service, this lady announced that she needed help, and that she would accept hats from anyone who was willing to help donate to her ministry. I was excited, because now, I could help with a cause from my childhood. I donated probably close to 100 hats to this lady's mission. At that point in time, I was thinking that I was a good servant who was meeting my purpose in life.

Through the years, I have bounced back and forth from positive to negative ideas of how I view myself. When negative forces come against me, I find it harder to climb back out of that negative pit that I have built for myself over the years. I will replay those negative words that someone may say to me over and over again in my mind. Then I start to believe that I am what those other people have said about me. However, once I get tired of being in that deep, dark pit, I will pick up an inspirational book and read what Joyce Meyer or Joel Osteen may have to say, and I then remind myself that I am worthy, I am loved, I am a good person!

Get into the habit of telling yourself only positive comments. You have to be with yourself every minute, every second of every hour of every day, so get into the habit of speaking kindness into your own life. Do not be so hard on yourself just because other people may have been mean to you over the years. Someone on the outside may not have approved of your birth, but I will tell you one thing and that is GOD APPROVED OF YOUR BIRTH! Otherwise, you would not be here right now at this very moment reading this message. God loves you, so start believing and telling yourself those words everyday! You become the thoughts that you think! So, think positive thoughts!

Sunday, May 1, 2011

May 1, 2011


Do you find your mind running like a freight train every minute of every day? Do you constantly think about something during your every waking hour? Is your mind so active when you go to bed at night that it takes you hours to fall asleep because you are replaying everything that happened during the day over and over again in your mind? Maybe, you have a hard time falling to sleep because you are too busy thinking about what might go wrong tomorrow or about the list of chores you need to get accomplished tomorrow. Sometimes, our minds can be so busy that they rob of us simple joys throughout our days. Calm your mind and bring peace into your life!

One thing that makes our minds so active is worry. Worry is a thief that robs us of joy, happiness, peace, and/or our lives. My mother is a chronic worrier. I do not think I can ever remember a time that my mother was truly happy in her life. She always worries about the weather, her kids, her neighbors, what people are thinking about, what people said, etc. Lots of times, my mother will worry about issues that may have happened 20 years ago, and she will replay the situations over in her head.  

Now, I do not believe that I am a constant worrier like my mother; however, my mind used to one of those runaway freight trains which never ceased. I would constantly be thinking about something, and usually, I would be thinking about things that did not matter. Many times, I would be thinking about situations that happened in the past. I would replay the event over and over again in my mind, and most times, these thoughts would make me downright angry. I would get angry about something which no longer mattered, and I would take my anger out on my loved ones who may have not even been involved with the initial situation. Those memories would rob me of my joy that I could have been experiencing right now, but I would be too caught up in the past.

One way to calm your mind is to stop living your life in the past. Get out of the past! The past in over and done with, and there is nothing you can do to change what may have happened. All you can do is learn from the mistakes that we may have made in the past. Learn to live in the NOW, and your mind will soon become calm. If you are in the NOW, there will be no room in your mind for negative thoughts from the past. You will soon learn to appreciate each minute we are blessed with each and every day. Calm your mind and watch your world around you change!